So the moral of Blackjack is that even if you follow the rules you can still lose. I just spent a weekend in Vegas, and I finally found a game I thought was interesting. I may have lost some money but the lessons I learned were priceless.
I have gone through life following the rules. Being a good girl. Doing things "right". Every time I broke the rules I would pay, sometimes way more than my rule breaking would call for. I was the one who would always get caught no matter what I did.
It made me think of the story of the tortoise and the hare, you know the story we were told as kids, about how slow and steady wins the race. Except then you grow up and watch all those hares cross the finish line while you are chugging away at your "slow and steady". Showing up at the finish line once everyone has gone home and all you look like is a slowpoke.
Don't get me wrong, there are times where the anekdote makes sense and the advantage is to take small steps. But what I realized was that I had spent my entire childhood learning "follow the rules and you win". And real life is quite different.
I need to learn to let go of those damn rules that were programmed into my brain so long ago. Obviously I am not talking about law breaking, that's a completely different matter. But I have been filled with social rules and a code of conduct that has been holding me back my entire life. And following them has never helped me in the least. So I am on a mission now to shed these invisible ties and discover what is actually possible.